nothing i can say

going to Sri Bestari for exam on wed

feel a little bit scare

but it's nothing for me

i can hadle it

i think...

------------------------------------------------------

love this song & group recently

我到底怎么了？

最近不知道为什么心情总是很不好

精神很紧张

甚至不敢去学校

在踏进校门的那一刻

我的心总是跳得很快

我到底在怕什么？

他们那些闲言闲语吗？

他们的眼光？

他们所给的压力？

今天鼓起勇气去学校

进到学校我放慢了脚步

我开始深呼吸

一步一步地迈向食堂

（好像很夸张）

p.s. 今天是星期五所以必须去礼堂集合

听到吵杂声我的心突然跳得很快

看到老师我更害怕

坐了下来就盖着我的耳朵

过了不久我忍受不了

我把书拿出来

拼命的画

在这个时候丽丽来了

她第一时间把我的手按着

然后叫我冷静

我根本冷静不到

我开始哭

到我忍无可忍的时候我大声地尖叫

然后冲去班上

丽丽和新妮跟着我

我到班外面就放肆大哭

然后倒地

她们扶我进去课室休息

我依然在哭

班上的马来人回来了

听到他们和老师的声音我又尖叫个不停

我不听的退后

吓坏了丽丽她们

丽丽抱着我叫我冷静

一直安慰我

我不想告诉他们我为什么会这样

我知道哭不能解决这件事情

但我依然选择独自面对

因为我知道所有的问题都必须自己解决

朋友只是我哭诉的地方

回到家我还是一样

那么的安静

那么的呆

我到底怎么了？

for u

미안 해요

이 다치는 건

다 내 잘못

정말 죄송 해요

看着眼前的刀

好想狠狠地割下去

但想到以前那种情形

我没那种勇气了

我只想放声大哭

把一切不开心都哭出来

但我欲哭无泪

想着想着

我的手已经流出红色的液体

my choice?

面对两个爱我的男人

该如何抉择呢？

我不希望失去任何一个

你们都对我很好

可是我怕伤害到你们

可以只做朋友吗？

真的不想失去任何一个

我最珍贵的礼物

我真的不会抉择

最近真的很烦

身体又不好

唉。。。

张卉君 加油啊 ！！！

sarang hae

WOAH !!!

oh yeah ~

yesterday was the last day of competition

i was so excited

got champion on sparring

but i feel disapointed cause my Dui Lian can't get

but it's ok

i'll try to make it more perfect next time for my students

why?

cause next year i'm going to be rafree

my belt is too high and i'm couch so they don't let me join

but it's ok

i don't want to fight with my students anymore

feel so sad to saw them bleeding and crying ><

anyway

my bro get the best rafree

cheer for him ^^

feel so proud for him

and for my students

well done who got medal

and those who didn't get try harder next year

p.s : i got a 4GB nano flash drive on lucky draw

countdown : 52days

busy days

competition is coming soon

almost everday i have not enough sleep

and almost everday we went to couch Su's house to do all those things

but before that i went to BRP to teach

so it's damn busy for me

and also it is damn tired for me

Monday we have to count a lot a lot a lot a lot of money

i think i have counted RM8000++

other than that we have done a lot of things

it is very tired for me

i went home at 3 or 4am

and today i wrap those present and type things

today i'm free cause we came late

haha ~~

but also i have to do things later

the thing i hate most is checking those loooooong name list

i hate it a looooot

you will ask why ?

it is because the sum of the student is 400-500

oops !!!

have to work now

goodbye

and good night

^^

i think i have a long time didn't update my blog dy

not that i'm busy but no mood to blog

these few days i'm very moody

maybe is because i'm giving myself too much stress

or maybe is people around me giving me stress

thank god i still have my hubby

on 5th july i went to see my dear

i went with his family

gosh !!!

i'm scared without reason

maybe it's the first time i get so close to them

but they are very friendly to me

i went to dear's house at about 8am

but we start our "journey" at 9 or 10 i think

why ?

cause we going to eat breakfast first

its took a long long time to reach the place

well

the camp look very malay style

i rather to pay RM400

i can't stay there ==

its hot and noisy because it is near to the air port

when i reach there

i can't even recognize my dear

his face bocome more 'sharp'

... lolx ...

he told me his friends want to see how i look like

but i don't know why

poor dear

he is getting thiner and darker

about 1230 we have to leave cause dear have to work at 1pm

kinda sad to leave him =(

before we went home

his sis brought us to Bum Bu Bali to eat

it is quite nice

then we go to his another sis's salon to exchange car

about 5 something i reach home and going to bed

~ the end ~